My Fear of The Tube

August 8, 2018

I no longer jump when someone moves, I no longer grip my fists and count down my stops, I no longer am hyper aware of anyone with a backpack. Somehow in 13 years, these feelings disappeared. And yet, I never noticed… that is until yesterday, when I found myself on a tube that had broken down in a tunnel, in this heatwave and I started to panic.

I started focusing on my breathing, put my headphones in and thankfully have some guided meditations on my phone and managed to calm myself down. But it made me think… why do we only consider how far we’ve come when we are dragged backwards? I guess I hadn’t noticed how much I had changed because it happened so slowly.

Not going to lie, yesterday freaked me out and gave me a big warning sign to slow down that I really needed. It also made me realise that we need to take a moment to recognise our growth. Don’t wait until something bad happens to be proud of yourself! 🔥#ScarredNotScared