As the first video of sex week I want to share my experiences of having scars in the bedroom. Body shaming is one thing but being body shamed in the bedroom is something that stays with you for a while. It’s you at your most vulnerable, with someone you trust enough to see you naked and when it doesn’t end well, it can be really cutting and a real blow to your body image and self esteem.
For the last 5 years, I’ve been body shamed more times in the bedroom than I care to admit and I’ve never told anyone. All were in relation to my scars and that’s a really hard thing to say out loud. So I never told any of my friends. In fact, I have never shared any of the experiences I mention in this video with anyone.
When it comes to sex, you can withdraw consent at ANY TIME.
Even if they are already in your bedroom.
Even if they are already naked.
Even if you have had sex before.
Any type of body shaming, and especially when it comes with malicious intentions, warrants:
– them being kicked out of your house
– you leaving their house
– the end of a friendship
– the end of a relationship
– NEVER SPEAKING TO THEM EVER AGAIN
Do not let your low self esteem convince you that you need to put up with body shaming EVER.
Have a no toleration policy when it comes to body shaming in your life AND in the bedroom.
Don’t put up with it, you deserve better.
All these body shaming experiences made me more passionate when it comes to #ScarredNotScared and it’s why I always say that my campaign is starting a conversation that needs to be bigger than just the people with the scars because people without scars need to have a greater understanding.
This tweet was my first time at trying to undo the shame. It’s more empowering than it looks because that GIF is one from my first ever YouTube video 3 years ago. It was a video called “How To Tell A Boy About Your Scars” and I didn’t have any answers, but I knew I just had to start talking. It’s how all this started and so today, is my chance to give you the answers.
The answers I never had, the answers I wish I did. Love you all for always supporting and loving me enough that I feel safe releasing this! This is my most vulnerable video yet and I’m already crying so I’m gonna shut up and just go watch the video. #ScarredNotScared